Monday, October 10, 2011

Sometimes life gets in the way...

Well, it sure has been a while since I have had the time to sit down and write.  Truly, I don't have much to report on the adoption front as life has found a way to remind us of things that are currently in higher demand of our attention.  Some of these things are the greatest things I have had to think about in my life and some have been the most challenging.

I want to keep this blog focused on adoption, but right now there is too much other "stuff" going on for that to happen.  The fun stuff is that our weddings are right around the corner.  In less than two weeks, Carla and I will be heading to Vermont where we will be getting legally married.  We are having our ceremony at the Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream factory and the reception will be a factory tour!  For us, we had to take advantage of the possibility of being legally married somewhere.  This will allow us to come back to Chicago and celebrate a real marriage with all of our friends and family.  So, in less than three weeks from today we will be having a bigger celebration here at home.  There are many last minute details that are currently occupying our attention.  It has been more fun than I thought it would be to make these plans with Carla.  We get so excited every time we figure something new out.  This week, it's been the place cards that have really gotten us excited.

I truly cannot wait to be married to Carla.  To be her wife.  I feel so lucky to have her as a part of my life and I am so ready to take this step in starting our future family.  I have to believe that one day, in our lifetimes, we will be able to be legally married in our own state and no one will ever be able to question our legal legitimacy as a family.  So many people ask why we aren't just getting a civil union here in Chicago and it is hard to explain why that will never feel the same for us as having a legal marriage.  But there are so many people out there who don't believe Carla and I should be a couple and probably more people who don't think that we should be allowed to raise a child.  Having a legal marriage takes away some of their arguments.  A long time ago, this country decided that being separate is inherently unequal.  So, we will just wait until this country starts to realize that idea applies to marriage rights as much as it applies to anything else.

So anyway, that has been taking up a lot of our time.  In addition, these past few weeks have been tough.  My dad has been sick, has had surgery, and is currently healing himself in the hospital.  It has taken much of our families attention and I am just so thankful that we have so many people in our lives to offer both him and us strength, kind words, and wishes.  He is doing better and we hope that he will be able to go home soon.  While he won't be able to join us in Vermont for the wedding, we are all hoping that he will be strong enough to come to at least some part of the Chicago wedding.  To me, that is not nearly as important as the fact that I now believe my dad is going to get well and is going to be well for a long time.  While we are all heartbroken about him missing the wedding, I am comforted by the fact that our potential child is going to get to know his or her grandfather.  I believe that by the time Carla and I are able to bring home a child, my dad is going to be in great health and have many years ahead of him to share with our new family.  And that, is what is important.  That is what really matters.  That is what I am looking forward to.

As usual, it appears that I had more to say than I thought I would.  I can't imagine there will be much blogging in the next few weeks, but by the start of November things should be back to normal.  Life will have settled down.  And I will be a married lady!!! Until then, we continue to dream about our lives with a child as a part of them.  We continue to get excited about really beginning the adoption process.  And we continue to take whatever it is life brings us and deal with it with humor, strength, and belief in better things to come.