To my dearest Millie, on your first birthday...

Millie,

Exactly one year ago today, you entered into this world and the world became a better place.  Exactly one year ago today, our minds didn't even know that you existed, though our hearts had already found you and wrapped you up inside of them.  Exactly one year ago today, your birth belonged to your birthparents.  They brought you safely into this world and their hearts wrapped you up right away with so much love.  I love that this day belongs to you and them alone.  I love that you had hours with just them.  That you started your life with them.  That we were still quietly waiting for you.  This makes sense to me and when we tell you the story of your life, that is where it will begin and it will always begin with them. And with you.  

One year ago today, I had no idea what was about to happen.  Even if I tried to imagine the most perfect daughter for our family, I could never have imagined you up.  You are beyond every expectation that I ever possibly could have had.  You.  You are the single most amazing person that I have ever known.  You are funny and smart and wildly curious.  You love books like me and you love animals like your Mama.  You find your way into every single person's heart who you meet.  You bring people joy.  Such joy.  On even the saddest of days and in the saddest of moments, your presence makes people smile.  You have this inner light that shines so brightly and people are drawn to you.  I could sit and just watch you for hours.  The smallest things make you so happy and you only want to share that happiness with the people around you.  You have so much love to give.  You give it to me and to your Mama and to the cats and the dog.  You love us all so much.  You love your teachers and your friends and you express this love without even knowing how to talk yet.  All of it. All of what you are is so incredibly amazing.  

And yes, you get cranky.  If you are tired or you are hungry, you let us know loud and clear.  You hate having your face cleaned and you absolutely will not tolerate getting your nose wiped. You would rather throw your sippy cup than drink from it.  Your lack of fear puts you in constant dangerous situations.  You hit your head on something at least twice a day and you can be extremely dramatic when you do not like what is in front of you.  And I love all of that about you.  Now let me be clear, it is not that I enjoy these moments, but they make you who you are and I will always love you for all of that.  I will always love you for exactly who you are and I will try my very very hardest to always let you be who you are and love you for exactly that.  

This first year of your life has taught me so much.  I have learned so much about you, about myself, about your Mama, about being a mother, about the world that we live in, and about what love can really feel like.  This first year of your life has proven how strong you are.  How strong your love is.  How strong the love around you is.  How many people in this world celebrate your very existence on this earth.  You are so very loved, Millie.  People that you don't even know, that I don't even know, have been touched by your story.  You have made people believe in the power of adoption, you have made people believe in possibilities, you have made people believe that dreams can really come true.  

All of this is to say that you are one very special girl and your birthday is one very important day.  I can't even begin to imagine what this next year of your life will bring to you and to all of us.  I can't even begin to imagine how much better you are still going to get.  I can't even begin to imagine all that I will have to say by the time we reach your second birthday.  All I know is that there is much goodness in store for you and I also know that there will be difficult things ahead and from what I have already seen, you are going to manage those difficult things by drawing on all the love that surrounds you.  And you will be fine.  You will be more than fine.  Your life is going to be more than anyone could ever imagine.  

Millie, I wish you the happiest of first birthdays.  I wish you so many good things in the year ahead.  I wish you strength for the tough things.  I wish you so much love from all of us who surround you.  I cannot believe how you much you have changed this family, how much you have changed me, in your first year alive.  I am thankful for you.  For everything that you are.  I love you.  Happy Birthday.  

Love, 

Mommy